What is OCD?

or, What’s the Big Deal About OCD, Anyway?

 

   Some people have never heard of OCD. Is it the initials of someone’s name? Is it an exotic fruit, bird, or plant?

   
    Some have heard of OCD, but think of it in terms of excessive hand-washing, or checking that the door is locked, or even avoiding the cracks in the sidewalk...you know, “step on a crack, break your mother’s back.”

    Some may even realize that OCD is a multi-faceted issue. It’s no diamond, yet may be a diamond in the rough, if you will. Some might think of OCD more like whack-a-mole...you resolve one issue, and a dozen more pop up.

    How many of us have actually been in the trenches of OCD? How many are willing to break the silence and give others a chance to walk a mile in the OCD person’s proverbial moccasins?

    OCD can definitely include repeated hand-washing, to be sure. Chapped, raw hands, for example. Or excessive cleaning of doorknobs, clothing, and skin. People see that stuff. They marvel that anyone could be so intent that they wash a plate a dozen times, or soak their clothes after freeing it of germs. What they don’t see is the inner turmoil that leads one to do such things. The constant pressure that if it’s not done, somebody, maybe even you, will die.

    Nobody but you can feel the questing, pulsating pressure, like a flea before it lands on its prey, in your brain, trying to land somewhere, anywhere, on a certain subject, or you feel like you’ll scream.

    No one sees the inner turmoil of trying to figure everything out mentally, because your eternal destiny is at stake. That all-too-familiar brick wall you come against every time to try to break it down.

    OCD confuses many people, especially people who think they know what it is, but never take the time to understand. They see the outward evidence, the tears, the knotted forehead, and hear the groans and even the desperate, pounding fist, but they don’t see inside the brain. What drives it. What it feels like. How you always want to do differently, but always seem to spiral back to your old coping patterns. How OCD can be like chains, and also a security blanket.

    Thankfully, there are those who do try to understand OCD. They watch the videos, they hear your obsessive spirals, they listen to your groans and sort of comprehend what’s going on. Thank God for people like that.

    Those that have gone through it, who walk down the same sidewalks, avoid the same cracks, and wash their hands red and raw, can truly sympathize.

    This is who my introduction is for...those who think of OCD as simple initials, those who delve into the issue and sort of grasp it, and those who wear my moccasins.

    Thank you for caring, for sharing, for bearing with me as I navigate the cold, dark, and often lonely waters of OCD.